Don’t be ashamed!
Thanks, I think, a lot to Brene Brown, the topic of shame is kind of having a moment. Whenever it comes up, I remember a story about my son Zach, one that is well-known (and often heard, I’m afraid) by my family. I’m sure they know what I am going to write about already just by the subject of this email.
This happened when Zach was around 13 or 14, I would guess. He was what they used to call "a latchkey kid" for several years. After school, he'd stay home on his own for a couple of hours until Randy and I got home from work. Often, he would go next door to play with a neighbor boy around his age.
One day I arrived home from work and found a mess in the hallway. There was a ladder under the attic access door in the ceiling, a garage work light sitting on the top of it, plugged in with a big extension cord draped across the floor, and the access door hanging open. Zach wasn't home so I went next door to find him. When I asked what was going on he said, rather loudly in his excited voice, that he had found a dead rat up in the attic and gotten rid of it. I backed off, put my hands up to indicate he didn’t need to say anymore, and said, "OK, okay," and left. When he got home I said, "You know, Zach, when people hear that there is a rat in your house, they think you must have a gross, dirty house, so maybe we shouldn't talk about it with the neighbors." Zach said, "Oh Mom, don't be ashamed! The neighbors found a rat's nest inside their cupboard when they remodeled the kitchen."
It still makes me chuckle to think of him saying, "Oh Mom, don't be ashamed!" What a cutie.
Shame also makes me think of meeting God when I die. I hope and pray God will say, “Well done, good and faithful servant,” but I can’t help but relate to the Narnian characters in The Last Battle by C.S. Lewis. Many of them felt ashamed when they came face to face with Aslan (who represents God in the Narnian chronicles). I imagine I will feel that way, too. I imagine suddenly I’ll have total recall of my whole life and those many times where I was mean, unkind, thoughtless, snarky, selfish, arrogant, belligerent, and all my other un-Christ-like behaviors will seem glaringly obvious in my life timeline. I see myself with eyes downcast, probably crying, not wanting to meet God’s eyes.
In the book, Aslan shows only love. He touches the characters’ foreheads with his forehead, he licks them with his rough, comforting tongue, and reassures them of his love. In the Bible, over and over we see Jesus doing the same. Even when he is frustrated with people’s lack of understanding, he feels pity and love. He gazes in love at a rich man who wants to be born again but cannot let go of his love for possessions, he cries when he looks at Jerusalem, knowing what fate will bring to them. Jesus speaks sternly and gets angry sometimes, but his love is ever-present. Even as he is dying on the cross he asks God to forgive those who are murdering him.
So although it’s hard for me to imagine not feeling deep shame when I meet God face-to-face, I know in my heart I do not need to be ashamed. When we remember Jesus’ love I — and you — can be confident that Jesus loves us. He loved us from when we were born to now, he loves us right now this minute, and he will love us until we die.
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What is this?? A while back, I had an idea. I was thinking of some friends I wanted to pray for, but I didn't have a specific thing to pray about on their behalf. I decided to pray that they would feel God's love. I decided to send them an email when I prayed, so they'd know and be encouraged. Then I thought about my many other family and friends who I would like to encourage with prayer, and decided to start this email.
Two things I try to do:
-- Encourage you with a reminder of God's love. My goal is to avoid anything where the response is "I should..." Just a short reflection of God's love.
-- Pray for you. I'll pray with each email, and please reply to me with anything you'd specifically like me to pray for you. I'll keep it confidential, don't worry.
You can opt out any time, no hurt feelings, no need for explanation, no worries. Just reply with a subject like "Unsubscribe" or "Opt out" or "No thanks" or whatever. If you would like to send me specific prayer requests. I will gladly pray with you. Email me at mavis at moonfamily.cc. I'll keep all communication confidential.